Survivors' Story

My name is Sarah and for 16 years I have been keeping my shameful secret. From the age of 13 years old I was abused by a family friend. When I was 18 years old I found out that I wasn't the first child to be abused by this man or the last. For this I feel really guilty, I didn't report it. I knew that my dad would try and hurt this person and I didn't want to lose my dad.

This man was a friend of my fathers and would spend a lot of time with our family. He used to make me do things to him, which being a naive 13 year old I didn't understand. The abuse stopped after my 16th birthday. This man is still around, so I see him a lot. He talks to me as if nothing ever happened. The thing that really annoys me the most is that my parents’ next door neighbour knew what was going on, yet did nothing to help me.

The first person I ever told about this was my best friend. The second person, my husband. I have told them I was abused, but have not yet found the courage to tell them exactly what has happened. Maybe someday I can talk to my husband about what happened to me, I just feel very ashamed. I just wanted to say for those out there who have been through something similar and spoke out, that you are very brave and I admire you all for that. I hope that some day I will be as brave as you are.

My husband has been my rock and he has to put up with a lot. It took me a very long time to have any sort of sexual relationship with anyone. Now he understands why I was terrified of letting him touch me. I love him with all my heart and feel safe when I am with him.

A Survivor